Sex is a highly physical act, and like any physical activity it comes with its risks of injury. Here are 10 true stories of wince-worthy mishaps that will have you showing some extra caution the next time you get down to business.
1. Cat attack
Cats are naturally inquisitive creatures, so how do you think they
are going to react if they see you bouncing away on your bed with no
clothes on? Unlucky pet owners have suffered deep cuts and scratches on
their backs, butts or even worse places as a result of a mid-sex cat
attack. Some believe this is a sign of cats trying to protect their
owners, whereas others think cats are just a sex-stopping nuisance –
either way, be sure to check that your next love making session is
2. Eye popping orgasms
Do you go into sex wanting a blinding moment of pleasure? Be careful
what you wish for. During particularly intense orgasms, the extreme
increase in blood flow can actually lead to ruptured blood vessels in
the eyes, causing temporarily reduced vision. Doctors have reported
cases of men and women complaining of reddened eyes and damaged
eyesight, with seemingly no clear causes until they ‘fess up about the
particularly exuberant sex they’d had recently.
3. Incorrect lubrication
If anything will make you more careful over what you use as
lubricant then it’s this story. A young man and his girlfriend were
staying at his grandmother’s, and when she left the house they decided
to have some fun. After searching for lubricant, they found her
nitroglycerin paste and decided it would do the job. How wrong they
were. The paste caused their blood pressures to plummet, and the
grandmother returned to find them unconscious and naked in her basement.
Probably not the most treasured memory she has of her precious little
4. Perks of the job
One unlucky woman in Australia was having sex in a hotel room when
her bed-rocking antics caused the glass light fitting to fall from the
ceiling onto her head, injuring her face and mouth. Rather than
complaining to the hotel management, the woman instead sued her
employers. Why? She was on a business trip, and she claimed they had
caused her both physical and psychological damage because the
intercourse-related incident took place during work required travel. Her
employers rejected the claim, pointing out that the injury was due to
what they tactfully described as “a frolic of her own”.
5. Contraception consumption
We all know it’s wise to take precautions, but sometimes safe sex
isn’t as safe as you might think. While performing oral sex, women have
been known to accidentally swallow the condoms that their partners were
wearing. Because of the material condoms are made of they are certainly
not designed for human digestion, and can lead to severe coughing and
breathing difficulties. They might come in tasty flavours, but
swallowing them is definitely not advised.
6. Beware of glasses
When the alcohol is flowing one thing can often lead to another, so
it won’t be surprising to hear that beer and wine glasses are one of the
items broken most often during sex, second only to bed frames. If you
want to avoid painful cuts and sharp objects stuck in places you don’t
want them to be, then be sure to clear away any broken glass before you
accidentally roll through it in the throes of passion – it happens more
often than you would think.
7. Heart stopping intercourse
Although it might not seem like it because of the amount of fun
you’re having, remember that sex is still a form of exercise, with
particularly steamy sessions burning over 300 calories in an hour.
Research by the Journal of the American Medical Association has
found that the increased physical exertion during sexual activity can
actually triple your risk of a heart attack in the hours shortly after
8. Sex and sports don’t mix
Sports stars earn millions, are well known celebrities, and are
generally in great shape, so it’s easy to see why they find themselves
having plenty of sex. However, this high level of sexual activity can
actually be detrimental to their careers because of the strain it piles
on their joints and muscles on top of their already demanding training
schedules. Footballer Kevin-Prince Boateng found this out when he pulled
a muscle in his thigh because of his supermodel girlfriend, who
apparently demanded sex from him seven to 10 times a week. Poor guy.
9. Paralysing hickey
Hickeys are the love trophies of teenagers the world over,
but they could actually be more dangerous than meets the eye. During
sex, a New Zealand woman was given a hickey by her partner, and soon
found her left arm partially paralysed. Doctors found that her
hoover-mouthed husband’s hickey was so strong that it had caused a blood
clot in an artery in her neck, causing her to have a minor stroke.
10. Bumps, breaks and sprains
Not all sex injuries are over the top or extreme – a UK study found
that one third of people admitted to suffering minor injuries resulting
from intercourse, including bruises, carpet burns, and sprained wrists
and fingers. Five per cent of those surveyed even said they’ve had to
miss work because of a sex-related injury, which must be a fun phone
call to make to the boss.